Have you ever wondered what Marilyn Manson's house looks like? Now that it is on the market [for 1.1 million, which really isn't all that much money, in the scheme of things] you can take a peek inside. The house is bright, sunny, and sparsely furnished. It's not decorated, and there is no evidence of a huge collection of taxidermy, nor are there any photos of his Chinese skeleton.
You think that pool has a "Notice there's no "p" in our ool. Let's keep it that way!" sign?
The listing clearly states "celebrity owned," so you know it's legitimate -- unlike Manson, who lives like a fairly normal person, despite all the tales of his life.
Some of the house's amenities include:
- Oversized family room [perfect for banging your teenage girlfriend!]
- A breakfast nook ["Where are you Manson?" "In the breakfast nook!"]
- Sewer - in street [I'd have thought it would be in the basement, honestly.]
To summarize: I'm kind of let down by Manson's shockingly humble abode.
There's no morgue, no coffins, no rafters for hanging from, no blood stains on the floors, and there are freaking palm trees all around it, rather than dead, gnarled branches full of crows.
Nonetheless, I was still considering buying the house... until further investigation of the listing showed the house does not have a spa. None at all. Well, I'm done. Much like my summation of Tom DeLonge's house and the lack of air conditioning in half of the 8-car garage, I repeat: I'm not a fucking peasant, and will not live like one, thank you very much, Mr. Manson.
