Not content with bleeding its loyal, paying fanbase dry with a monthly subscription to a game that seems to keep players going in an infinite loop of finding the best items just in time for the next update to include a more powerful set that will promise to take even longer to get than the last, blizzard is now selling ringtones and mobile wallpapers.

Yes, thats right, you with the WoW (World of Warcraft) addiction so bad you've lost your job, your girl, and any hint of a physique you once had--you can know take a little piece of your low-polygon, cartoon-style world with you whenever you feel nostalgic for RL (Real-Life).

But what's even more awesome than all that is how little it's going to cost you.  Just $2.99USD per ringtone!

Did I say "little" and "cost"... I meant to say "WTF" and "ROFLOL".  $2.99 per ringtone?  Really?  You can get a full song from amazon for 99 cents and send it to your phone yourself, take the two dollars and use it buy more ramen or whatever else WoW junkies eat to stay in such "good" shape.

Despite the high price, Blizzard is NOT just a bunch of "newbs" QQing infront of the Ragefire Canyon of business sense, LFG, on an old, lvl60+ server.  This is a company that has been evaporating peoples' time and money on a scale that gaming has never seen before.  You can be damn certain they will make a killing on these tones.  The "Murloc Gurgle" is sure to be a hit at LAN parties everywhere.

And despite the numerous references, I don't play WoW anymore and I have been living happy and clean for over 2 years.  I know, it's quite an achievement to be free from pixel addiction for so long.  I'm a hero to many... an epic hero.